Life has changed and so it's time to revisit my old friend.....my blog

Its crazy that my last post was a year ago. Little did I know what we were in for. I like to write and could tell you all the little details, but that would take to long for you as the reader and me as the author. So basically, my blog needs to change to"In a nutshell" because I have changed. The title "Hillstrom Family" the blog doesn't quite fit anymore because this is not my journal of my family (I still like to use pen and paper for that). This is my therapy, my thoughts on where I fit in this world, what is going on in my world and I go through this experience of life.

SO that being said, in a nutshell....The past year in review:

Oct 2013: I received a phone call this week that my best friend has cancer and my heart is sad. She starts writing her blog again and inspires me to do the same. Eli and I just rented our own home in Las Vegas, Nevada after a 6 months stay at my parents house while we were getting back on our feet after my husband lost his business in Vancouver, WA. We are in the middle of a move.

Sept 2013: For my 30th birthday I ended up locked up in a psychiatric hospital for 10 days. I had postpartum psychosis. I lost touch with reality. I went nuts. My brain was like a computer gone haywire, glitching and spitting our information rapid fire. I lost time. It sped up, it slowed down. I can't recall an entire week of my life and it feels weird. Once I got back in touch with reality and that I really was Janel Hillstrom, now age 30, now mother of 3, now living in Las Vegas, living with my parents, no longer a home owner (our house sale finalized the day before my husband has to take me to the ER), I feel like I don't know who I am. This isn't what I expected to be doing at age 30. I will blog about this experience more as I try to process it.

August 2013: My oldest son turns 6. I have been a mother for 6 years. I am happy to be a mom.

July 2013:  I missed my friends and family outside of Las Vegas. I rented a car, packed up my 3 kids ages 5, 3 and 2 months and drove to Denver, Colorado. It was really fun.

June 2013: I am recovering from having a baby...'nuf said.

May 2013: I had a baby. I say I because my husband couldn't be there. We live in Vegas and he was born in Irvine, CA. We named him Levi. He is beautiful and so was his birth. I will blog about that later.

April 2013: I am living at my parents house and growing a baby. I have 2 kids and no friends in Las Vegas. Life was weird.

March 2013: Eli decides to take a leap of faith and my brother buys him a plane ticket to interview for a job in Vegas. He gets the job and we will have health insurance, a steady income, and a fresh start. The job starts the next week and he can't fly back to move us. I'm 8 months pregnant. Working part-time and unaware I am the breadwinner. I have the responsibility to 2 kids while my husband is away. I don't have any money for daycare. I don't fell like reaching out to my friends/family. I am tried. I will blog about our move later.

February 2013:The business is still struggling. My husband is working through the night to try and make more $. My sister in law has a baby in Vancouver. We were excited to see them in the hospital, but also realizing we have a baby on the way too.

January 2013: The business is struggling. My husband is working through the night to try and make more $. Its not fun to see a man work so hard to support his family and not see the results of that hard work. I am happy to haul in firework to keep our fireplace warm and have friends come over and play games with me to distract me from my current situation.

December 2012: Things are tight, but we aren't talking about finances to save face. It was a light Christmas on our end, but family and friends make up for our shortcomings. Our kids make us happy. My present to Eli was a picture with the result of the ultrasound I had a few weeks prior.  I hadn't looked yet so we were both surprised to find that...We are having a son.

November 2012: My husband wholly took over a business one month ago. The money isn't coming in and it is stressful. My house is old, cold, needs work and we are trying not to turn on the heat to save   have money to pay other bills.  My husband is working all night to try and get ahead. This isn't very fun, but I have hope.

And with that, my blog is caught up. My, that feels good. I loved being a blogger when this first came out, but then I got caught up in...well.. keeping up. My house, my car, my clothes, my job, my husbands job, our income, my stuff doesn't matter to me right now.  And that is okay. I'm okay. My relationships with my family and the people in my life are the most import thing to me right now. I missed everyone while I was locked up. So I'm back friends. I've missed you.

Lots of Love,

Janel